How to Ask for Help Without Shame

Asking for help is not an easy thing to do. When you ask for help, you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position, or so you might think.

First of all, you are admitting you need help, which often leaves people feeling weak or incapable. You also open yourself up to rejection which might make you feel incompetent.

But, have no fear. Keep in mind that everyone asks for help some time in their lives, and most people like to help others. There are five ways that you can ask for help confidently and effectively.

1. Ditch the pride
First of all, you have to let go of the pride. Pride can be a major hindrance to anything in life, especially asking for help. If your pride is keeping you from asking for help, remember that no one is perfect, and it’s important for you to realize that it doesn’t make you a lesser person for asking.


2. Be specific with what you need help
Prepare what you are going to say when you are ready to ask for help. Be specific with exactly what it is you need help. Maybe you do not need help accomplishing the whole project but one piece of it has you feeling stuck. Be sure to mention exactly what it is you need so that the person you are asking knows how to help.

3. Be sure the time is right
Be sure that you know that the time is right to ask someone for help. If you do not take into consideration the fact that this person might have some areas in his life right now that would make it difficult for him to help you, you could run into a road block. If possible, hold off until you know for sure it is a good time.



4. Give reasons why you need help
Just like being specific with what you need help, be specific with why you need help. Most people are willing to help when they know what the real reason is that you are asking.

5. Let go of the fear of rejection
One of the biggest reasons people do not ask for help is because they are afraid they will be rejected. Rejection can leave you feeling deflated and insignificant, but keep in mind that if your friend does say no, they probably have a good reason that has nothing to do with who you are or your relationship with them.

Before asking for help, think about the worse case scenario that might happen if they were to say no. It is probably nowhere near what will happen in the real situation, so take a risk and ask.


Asking for help does not make you a lesser or a weak person. It actually takes a lot of courage and strength to ask for help. Once you have prepared what you are going to say, plan for a good time, and consider rejection, you are ready to give it a shot and ask for help.

Source: Amerikanki [full_width]